How learning to say “NO” changed my life and helped me learn self-care

I’m sure at some point most people want to say “NO” to certain people and situations. Haven’t we all? Saying no to the partner who doesn’t treat us right, or the boss who asks us to do something we don’t agree with, or the friend who lies to us and we still are friends with them.

I used to be that person who put up with these kinds of situations. The unhealthy relationships, the jerk bosses and the friends who don’t deserve to be in my life. It drained me. It sucked the life out of me, and I gave up on being happy about my future. It was depressing.

One day earlier this year I put my foot down, and started saying “NO” to these situations….and things started to turn around for me in a positive way.

Not accepting negative situations, actions or people in my life has set the standard of what I’m willing to allow into my life, and what I’m not. It’s almost like I put up an invisible barrier, a force field if you will, to protect my inner sanctuary, and keep it safe. Not allowing anyone or anything to pierce my barrier bubble with their negativity has been an incredible gift to myself.

At first I felt bad. I felt GUILTY for saying “NO.

Why should I feel guilty for someone else’s behavior? I shouldn’t. Ever. I do not cause, nor can I control the actions of others. Even though I know this to be true, saying “NO” used to give me guilt. So I would politely brush things aside, or laugh them off. This allowed them to stay in my life, and affect me negatively.

The first time I said “NO”, I felt empowered. I took a stand against a behavior that I found offensive. I put myself FIRST, which is where I should be. I started to realize how this can and was positively affecting me, so as these situations have come up since that first day, I have continued to reject them. This to me falls under the label of “self-care”.

Self-care is becoming so important to me, because there is so much value in it. If we do not take care of ourselves properly, or take the time we need to do what we need for ourselves, how will we have energy to give to others? We won’t.

Since learning the value of saying “NO”, I have found so much happiness in things like an amazing relationship, clearing out the clutter of toxic friends, working towards my dream career and life…..It’s been a beautiful transition that I wish so many others could go through.

If you feel stuck in the mire of toxic negativity, comment, or message me, and let’s get you happy. Happiness is worth every ounce of self-care you may feel you don’t deserve or have time for. Why? Because once you see things from the other side? You’ll never look back and you’ll see how worth it it is to have a life that leaves you feeling happy and fulfilled 🙂

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